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Christmas is for humans, and I will not ruin the surprises by opening all
their presents.
Christmas light bulbs, Christmas ornaments, Christmas stockings, and tinsel
from the Christmas tree are not food.
I am the alpha dog, therefore I do not need to protect my new Christmas
rawhide from the omega dog by taking it outside to eat when the wind chill
is -10 F.
I will not demolish the Christmas tree and drag the string of lights out
into the backyard through the doggy door.
I will not dive into the Christmas tree to get the candy canes (which I will
eat -- paper and all).
I will not eat my Christmas doggie treats until after they're out of the
stocking!
I will not even THINK about going underneath the Christmas tree and piddling
on the dining room rug.
I will not get into a fight with the bigger dog next door, making my human
have to call the vet's at Christmas.
I will not get tangled up in the Christmas tree lights and pull the tree
down while trying to get at a cat through the conservatory window.
I will not pee on Grandma's Christmas presents that are under her tree as
soon as we enter her house.
I will not pee on the Christmas tree.
I will not steal the neighbor's Christmas light bulbs.
The bowl underneath the Christmas tree is not a dog dish. I will not drink
from it. It will make me sick.
Any suggestion? |
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So true.....oh so true....lol Dad would reply to this, while shaking his head
"I've been lied to before". I showed this to my dog, and he gave me a look that said "Yeah, right. Not
in THIS lifetime!" I will not express my amorous interest in Aunt Polly by wrapping
myself around her leg and rubbing my male parts on her. She's a cut chick
but just for the holidays, I will exert some self-control |
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